LA Religious Congress

Well our first day we went to universal studios. It was quit enjoyable. I really enjoyed the studio ride and the part where we entered the King Kong 3D experience. Fr. Reed screamed bloody murder when the T-Rex came and I thought it was one of the funniest things I have ever witnessed in my entire life.  You could see the fear in his eyes. I thought he was going to have a heart attack. I also really enjoyed the transformers ride. It was an enjoyable time. 

LA religious conference was a good experience. Over 40,000 Catholics in one convention center. That is kinda scary. I heard Ronald Rolhieser and he spoke about fear. He said how it can help us to do God's mission or hinder us from doing God's mission. I think the bottom line of the talk was Do not be afraid . We hear it all the time in the people. He said if you truly believe you should have no fear.  Infact it is almost silly to have fear. But we fear everything. We fear about being poor, fear of losing our job, fear of being lonely. I guess it is a lot about perspective. I think you need to be in a comfortable space and comfortable with who you are and where you are at and expect anything. 

It is like the chinese story of the man who received all this wood and built a fence and the neighbors said wow that is good. He said, "Who knows". Then a storm came and destroyed his fence and his horses ran away. Then the neighbor said, "Wow that is real bad news". Then the mans horses came back with more horses and cows. Then the neighbor said, "Wow what good luck". Then the man said, "who knows". Then his son was riding one of the horses and falls and breaks his leg. The neighbor says "Wow that is bad luck". Then the man said, "who knows". Well then his son didn't get drafted into the army because he has a broken leg. So this can go on and on. But I think you get the point.

I also saw Greg Boyle who wrote Tattoos of the heart. He is a very good speaker. He is a jesuit who works with the Gangs of LA. He started homeboys industries. Jobs not jails. He did a fantastic job of speaking. So captivating. Very inspirational. He does amazing work. He has started a clothing line, salsa, restaurants, education services, employment services, tattoo removal and more. He has gotten in the middle of gang fights. Incredible stories. I highly recommend reading Tattoos of the Heart. 

Then I met Patrick Atkinson who has started ITEMP. He has an incredible story, He also started a nonprofit organization to raise awareness and to fight anti-trafficking of humans. He works in Guatemala, USA, India, Malawi, and El Salvador. He started and orphanage in Guatemala. I really enjoyed my conversation with him. He said to me "I would love if you would come work for me in Guatemala at the orphanage. It is very tempting because that sounds like something right up my alley.  It is always something got think about.

The novices had to take turns running the vocations booth. SO basically we were to try and recruit interested people into the Salvatorians. I am normally very extroverted and feed off people. That is where i get my energy from. I also noticed I had should pain the whole time in LA. It would not go away. I think it might have been because we were told to were the habit while working the booth. I felt uncomfortable. Poeple look at you differently. I didn't like it. I had numerous people say, "Hello Father" and I had one lady kiss my hand. Maybe it is because I don't feel I deserve to wear it because I have not taken first vows. Maybe because it is a reality of my future and I am nervous about it. Maybe it is because I have to make a decision in the next few months on whether to enter or leave the Salvatorians and I don't feel ready to make a decision. All my other novices are 100% ready to take there journey to priesthood and I am sitting on the fence. I do think i am carrying a lot of stress on myself with making a decision. Maybe it is a red flag because I am not sure. I think the best thing I can do is try to be present to right now but pray about the future and try to picture where I will be.

Winter pictures

So I heard the Pope just say that priests can now get married. There is only two requirements. 1. you must be retired from your ministry. 2. You must be 80 years old or older.

 This is the cemetery in our backyard. I occasionally go for walks back there.

 I went cross country skiing one afternoon at a golf course

 This is Marcel taking a swing at the piñata fro Fr. Reed's birthday

 During our ICN sexuality retreat I set up a bonfire on the beach. People were amazed you can have a bonfire during the winter on a beach

We celebrated Fat Tuesday at our ICN retreat. King cake baby

I went with Patric to the Milwaukee Comic Con. We were the only ones dressed up but everyone appreciated it and took pictures of us. He went as batman and I went as Thor.

By the way Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are now worth money. I had quit a few of those growing up.

Sexuality Retreat

Before we went to LA we had a 4 day retreat on Sexuality. I thought the speaker did a really good job. Religious life is not a normal life. I think the thing I realized most is I need affection in my life. Then I have to ask How am I going to get that affection? I need deep intimate conversation. I need touch. I know i am a touchy feely guy. I need to find healthy ways. Is hugs enough? Is someone holding my hand enough? Is getting a massage enough? Is playing contact sports helpful? I have to spend time and answer questions like these. I thing I found interesting is there are 12 different ways for intimacy. I am sharing them below. 

12 Opportunities for Intimacy

1.     Genital intimacy (erotic or orgasmic closeness)

2.     Emotional intimacy (being tuned to each other’s wave length) *

3.     Intellectual intimacy (closeness in the world of ideas)

4.     Aesthetic intimacy (sharing experiences of beauty)

5.     Creative intimacy (sharing in acts of creating together)

6.     Recreational intimacy (relating in experiences of fun and play)

7.     Work intimacy (the closeness of sharing common task)

8.     Crisis intimacy (the closeness in coping with problems/pain)

9.     Conflict intimacy (facing and struggling with differences)

1. Commitment intimacy  (mutuality derived from common investment)

1. Spiritual intimacy (the we-ness in sharing ultimate concerns)

1.  Communication intimacy (the source of all types of true intimacy)

The bottom line is what is going to make me the most loving and most free I can be?  What are my deepest desires?

Burn Victim

I received a phone call at 4:30am. Some one's brother of a friend of mine was in an explosion with third degree burns over 90% of his body. The mother was crying and was hoping for a miracle out of me. I showed up the next day and we prayed and I hugged them. I felt helpless. I brought Fr. Reed. There was nothing I could do. The mother was so angry with God. She has already lost another child in a car accident at the age of 19 years old. It is ok to be mad at God. We went in to see the patient. He was covered up and swollen. i prayed as best I could.
Two days later we went back and the whole family was there. I felt so honored and blessed just to be with the family and listen. That was all I can do. We did an anointing of the sick with the family surrounding the patient in bed. I felt the presence of God in the room. It was amazing the amount of the love that was being poured out in the room. It was incredible. I felt bad for the family.
We are not in control. No matter how much I think I am in control of my life, we are not in control.
The doctor had no hope. They kept him on a vent and on pain med's and that is it. Praying and hoping for a miracle. They did a novena for nine days at 3pm everyday.
They got a hold of me and they said we are puling the mask off. SO I raced down tot he hospital. We prayed a novena and waited for respiratory therapy.
We left the room, they pulled off the mask. He instantly turned white. He had slow deep breaths. There was a lot of crying in the room. It was hard to watch. Then he took his final deep breath and then you knew he was gone. You knew he left this world. We held hands around him and I prayed. All I remember about praying was what a gift we was to the world and to everyone around him. I remember thanking God for all the lives he had touch and to trust in God to lead him where ever he is going on the next part of his journey. I am sure I said more but that is all I remember. I felt the doctors hand on my should and he looked at me very sincere and said "You did a great job. Thank you". This was an experience I will never forget. I felt sorry for the family but yet happy because I truly believe he is in a better place. No more suffering. I felt blessed and honored to have been there. God was at work.