Cedar Lake Indiana

The World cup has been very exciting to me. Lot's of great games. I had the treat of meeting Noah's dad at a place called beer to watch the USA vs Belgium game. Great game but we did not favor in the results. I got to spend 4th of July with Mrs. C and Ned down in Chicago. We actually went to a wedding which was fun. It took place in a Mexican restaurant that the father of the groom owned. The highlight for me was no one was dancing on the dance floor except this probably 13 year old boy who is mentally retarded. So I decided to get out there and join him. He had a blast. We would just copy what ever I would do. I would pump my right arm in the air and then he would do it. The next thing I know there is a woman who is probably about 40yrs old and mentally retarded dancing with us and she was having a ball.  Sure enough then other people started joining in. Then the best was seeing the fireworks from Mrs. C's balcony. We saw the ones from Navy Pier and about 7 different sets front he western suburbs. It was really cool

I then headed down to Cedar lake Indiana for my six day retreat focusing on the vows of celibate chastity, poverty and obedience. I state at Lourdes Friary in a hermitage wight he Franciscan. The hermitage was about 10ft by 20ft in the woods with a view of a pond. I had many encounters with animals, deer, raccoon, to every single colored bird you can imaging from orioles, cardinals, blue jays and more. I went to mass and prayer int he morning with the Franciscans then I would usually spend most of the day by myself. I spent probably half of it in silence and the other half reading my old journals from the past couple years. Then I would try and reflect in where is God in all of this.
What I have learned from me my old journals thus far is that I do love living in community. I really feed off of others ideas and it is great being around people who seem spiritually sound and want to make a difference in the world.  It seems like the best community I ever lived in was the CAC which is surprising because I lived with six women then. Praying and eating together was a blessing. Some of the best times and conversation I have ever had. I have said numerous times in my journal I like being in community. I also enjoyed working Nuc med and making a difference in peoples lives. I loved the patient interaction. It was a goal for me to try and get to know them and turn there day around if they are having a bad one. I loved being in Tanzania. I had a blast there. The people are incredible there. Time didn't exist. I felt I was present in every moment. There seem to be a sense of peace in me. I loved leading Boyscouts at the boundary waters canoe area. That was the time of my life. I had great joy being in the wilderness an on an adventure with the excited boys that really looked up to me. I love working with the youth. I love working retreats and attending retreats. I have felt God's presence in many retreats I have been on and come back fresh and renewed.
Wow 2013 was a miserable year. Probably the most miserable year of my entire life. So much bull shit and drama. So many unnecessary things. Even though it was the most challenging year of my life I have probably learned the most from that year about myself and others. I'm glad it happened even though I wouldn't want it to ever happen again. I also struggled with God a lot in that year. 
The Franciscans have a real deep faith and trust in God. I'm so impressed. I really learned a lot from these old men when I talked with him. Fr. Sergis is 96 years old moving good and entirely with it. Infact he is heading to South Africa for 3 months. He was an exorcist there for 15 years. He said I know the devil. The devil is real and I have seen him. Interesting man. Then Father bert was my spiritual director for the week. An old peaceful Polish man. He taught me the power of prayer and what it can actually do. He said, You have so much fire in you to help the world and make it a better place. That is great but that is not only your job. That is mainly God's job. He really helped me get in touch with listening to God and surrendering to God's will what ever it may be. He said, If you keep praying to God "Show me your will Lord. He will answer when the time is right and it will be crystal clear. I promise you that. But you have to have deep faith and believe with all your heart".

I do feel I am in the right place at the right time. I am very peaceful right now. There is no rush to life. I am going to take one day at a time. First vows are a 13 month commitment. I see how the vows allows one to love more and be there for people. They are a gifts given from God if there taken seriously and responsibly. I am going to take first vows on August 10th see how the rest of the year goes and probably re-evaluate my life at the end of december. I have confidence I will know when the time is right. I notice a lot of the great spiritual writers always talk about surrendering to God. Once they surrender and listen to God's will they are at peace and have an internal knowing. Paul Wigley said, I was made to be a music teacher and I feel so blessed to have been able to do that. I will know some day why I am on this planet.

 Dressed up for the USA vs Belgium game.

 Fr. Sergis, Myself, Fr. Bert, and Fr. Tony

Big pond with a statue of Mother Mary in the middle.

Many Visitors

Wow I keep getting visitors. V came and visited in which we went biking and hiking. My parents came and spent a few days with us in which we saw the Twins play the brewers. Then the Grinnell brothers came for a day and we biked around Milwaukee and went to Polish fest. Then I get a call from Rus Swanson and his family that there coming to Milwaukee for a wedding and there is no hotels due to the Jehovah Witness convention at Miller Park. So he, Bridget, Ade, and Ruby stayed with us for the night. I keep asking my house mates if it is ok for guests to stay here and luckily they have been flexible. It is a real treat having guests come.
The story I would like to tell is a situation I had with Rus' 3 year old girl or maybe she is 4 now. I met Russ, Bridget and the girls at Fred’s for hamburgers. I just came from an ordination so I am wearing my habit. By the way their girls are so cute. I love their little girls. Ade had to go poop and wanted me to take her so I walk with her to the park holding her hand. She then wants me to go into the girl’s room with her. I said I can’t because I am a boy. I was able to convince her I can’t go in. Suddenly she calls my name. MJ MJ MJ MJ MJ. So I open the door and say what? She says I’m done pooping I need you to wipe me. I said I can’t go in the girl’s bathroom. She says yes you can. I am in my habit at a public park. So I call Bridget and she said it is ok you can go in. So I thought screw it and I go into the girls bathroom and she is in the back stall sitting on the toilet. Then she said there are spider webs. Can you get rid of the spider webs and I said ok. So I get rid of the spider webs. Next thing I know a lady walks into the bathroom. I try to be quiet and say nothing. Well Ade then asks me a question. Well now I have to speak up. So I start talking to Ade and hoping the lady in the stall next-door thinks I am this little girls dad. The lady leaves the bathroom. I’m thinking ok ill wipe you and lets get out of here. But then she says I don’t want you to wipe me. I want mommy to wipe me. I thought great. I said no I can do it. She says No I want mommy. I thought what ever I am not going to argue with a 3 year old. So then I walk out of the girl’s room. A teenage boy sees me walk out of the girl’s room and I’m wearing my habit. He didn’t say anything or maybe didn’t put the connection together. Well I don’t want to leave her by herself yet I need to go get mom a block away. I call Bridget and no answer. So I start walking away constantly turning around at the bathroom to see if anyone enters or leave. Thank God I see Bridget walking towards me. I know this seems stupid but I could have gotten in serious trouble. And that really bothers me. Anyone can make assumptions and really tarnish a person’s character. The way society has portrayed priests I could have easily gotten thrown in jail for being in a girls bathroom wearing a habit. I felt I was doing the right thing but it doesn’t matter. Is this a struggle I really want to deal with for the rest of my life? I will say it was a real treat having Russ and his family around. They made my day.

 The mountain biking crew along the Milwaukee rive.

 klement sausages at miller park, Hot dog, chorizo, italian sausage, German Brat

 Mom with the Bronze Fonz

Having a silly picture with Ade and Ruby.

The Zoran hitchhiker

I had a God sign on Wednesday. I just turned off Highway 94 and as I was driving I saw a man in a dress shirt running on the side of the road. So I turned around and asked him if he needed a ride. He said his semi truck is in the shop being fixed for the day. So I gave him a ride to the movie theater. He said his semi truck broke down and he had to have it towed to the Volvo dealer. He is from Yugoslavia. Well I dropped him off  and he thanked me. I didn’t realize until I got to the school I tutor at that he left his glasses case in my car. So I thought after tutoring I will stop by the movie theater and hope he is there. Well after tutoring I was following Bruce in the car  to go visit one of the kids I tutor who is in another school because he got kicked out for having weed on him. I’m looking at the time and I realize I still need to drop off the glasses case and get to my 3:00 meeting. So I turned around and went to the movie theater. Of course he was not there. Well I thought oh well. So I am driving and want to get on 94 heading west but the exit is closed so I had to follow a detour on the frontage rode. Sure enough as I’m going I see the Volvo truck place and I immediately slow down and park the car and sure enough there is Zoran standing outside. God works in funny ways. Amazing how that works. The timing couldn’t have been any better.

Today it is 62 degrees and sunny. Beautiful day. I was just driving by Bradford Beach and it is packed. Everyone is in there swimsuits too. People want the sun so bad. I just couldn’t people seeing all the people in swimsuits when it is 62 outside. Hearty Northerners.

Marcel's Birthday

 Went with Sarah for a Ride in Chicago

Is Summer here?

Well we have just finish our ICN classes which is good and had a picnic celebration. The also finished our Just Faith classes and classes for Fr. Andre. It has been a very good informative year of really digging into the bowels of oneself. Summer is finally here and I am happy about that. I spent a day in Chicago biking around with a friend. Spent a day on lake Michigan riding on Dave’s boat. I have mainly been busy working on getting Second Chance Employment off the ground. Our goal was to raise $20,000 by June 1^st so we can get it up and running for the summer. Right now I have been working on grants for different foundations and trying to figure out ways to raise money. This is not an easy task. I made a video for Kickstarter but that website isn’t really for nonprofits. There are websites for nonprofits to get started but I guess they don’t work as well as kickstarter. I am also trying to get in collaboration with other nonprofits to gain there support.

I hope everyone enjoys there memorial day.

 Rob and I mountain biking along Milwaukee river

 Our Just Faith Group

Holy Week 2014

On Holy thursday I attended Congregation of the Great Spirit. Luckily I started feeling better by then. I was sick for about a week. I think I had a strong cold or the flu. It sure dragged me down and made me week. With the washing of the feet at church mass there was only about 30 people. There were 4 basins and pitchers. We took turns washing each others feet. It was very neat to see. Someone sou,d ways your feet then you would wash the next person and everyone was helping each other out. I had this cute little 2 year old indian girls who helped me pour water on her brothers feet and then I wiped his feet. It was touching experience.

Friday I headed down to Racine to help Leo with Geometry. He then taught me about iMovie. now I am addicted to it and love making trailers. It has been a fun project. Fr. Bruce and I then watched Mel Gibson's the Passion of Christ with 4 students then we went to a fish fry afterwards. It was a long day but a good day. I think Mel Gibson goes a bit over the top but he sure gets the message through on what Jesus went through.

Saturday was the night Vigil. Mass started with The elders drumming behind the altar. Then one of the elders got up and told the Great Creation story from the Lakota People. It seemed very similar to the creation story with Adam and Eve. In the middle of the mass we went outside where the bonfire is and lit the easter candle and prayed to the four directions. We then migrated back into the dark church with our candles and the women dressed in there Native American outfits did the snake dance down the aisle. It was very peaceful to watch. The snake dance and signing is about shedding our old skin and becoming new. We then renews our baptismal vows and then the native women blessed us by shaking cedar branches dipped in the baptismal water at us. It was a very nice mass and then at the end we had a big potluck in the basement.

Sunday the next morning at 6 am we met across the street from where I live to have a native American Piece Pipe ceremony. Al opened up the ceremony with drumming and chanting in the Lakota tongue then we did the prayer to the four directions. Then Al explained that the chanting he is doing is asking the Great Creator to listen to our prayers and that we are offering tobacco to the Great Creator and the smoke that comes out of the Pipe is our prayers rising to be listened too. He then passed the Piece pipe around the circle in which we all smoked. Then there was a closing of drumming and burning of cedar branches. One of the guys gave me cedar leaves and said if you have a cold boil this in water and drink it and you will be fine. So I did. It didn't taste to bad. I am not sure if it worked because I was already feeling better at that point but maybe it finished off my cold.  We then had a big feast that night with our house and we invited 3 individuals over to join us. It was realizing and then we finished the night off watching the Sopranos.
Easter we were blessed with 68 degree weather. That only lasted a day. It is 47 today and I hope warm weather is on its way.

 Foot washing of Holy Thursday at Congregation of the Great Spirit

 Fr. Bruce is holding Angel's new born baby girl who is one week old

This is preparing of the peace pipe for the ceremony on the lake front Easter morning

Addictions retreat

We had a three day retreat on addictions. It was mainly about Alcohol. It is amazing how drugs and alcohol can over power a person and make them completely and totally dependent. Addiction often happens when there is something missing and trying to fill a void in ones life. It makes the user feel better for a little bit to get that high but then they come down and then they have to get that high again and pretty soon they become totally dependent on it.  We watched the movie " hello my name is Bill W" and we watched " Love is not enough" and it is the story about Bill W's wife. Bill Wilson is the founder of AA. It is amazing what his wife put up with. The faith she had in him was incredible.  I thought she was more impressive than Bill.  She knew there was something inside him that was able to defeat this. There was a scene in the movie and he is holding on to the bottle of vodka and he says, "I don't want to drink this. I love you Lois, but I need this. I don't want to drink this but I love Alcohol. " He was absolutely powerless to it. Incredible. We also heard stories of drugs just destroying lives. We live in such an addictive society. Internet and social media are at the tips of our finger tips. There are a ton of internet addictions from porn, to surfing the internet and constantly clicking on things, to social media, to online gaming. Ones reality becomes the internet. There fantasy becomes there reality. How sad is that. Kids put so much time and effort into it. The bullying online is a real problem. Kids have committed suicide just by what others have written about them on the internet. There is no filter. People just write with out thinking. Dangerous.

It really gave me appreciation to the 12 step program. I like step two that I am powerless and I need to rely on a greater power than myself. The 12 step program is really a deep examination of ones conscious . Another quote that caught my attention was " don't say I am sorry. Say that I am wrong".

It made me have a real awareness in everything I do. Pay attention to your feelings and what is going on in your life. It is easy to get addicted to anything.

The weather is Finally warming up. I think spring is finally here.

I w as upset with myself the other day because i was at a stop light and There was a homeless man asking for money. I usually keep a box of granola bars in my car and hand them out. But I was out of granola bars. I thought I only had a 20 in my wallet so i didn't want to give him that. SO I ignored him outside my window. OF course what does Jesus say, "Who are my brothers and sisters?" so I felt guilty when I drove off. Then when I looked in my wallet I had two single dollar bills in there. Pope Francis says "Who am I to judge?"

Other than that I am currently trying to shake a cold.

On Saturday we are heading to Casa maria to volunteer for a bit and check out that ministry. It sure seems like the root of all problems in the world is poverty. The trafficking of humans for labor or sex generally happens to people who are willing to do anything to get money or bring money home for the family. Or they live in a poverish area and the family is willing to sell a child for money or are stolen away and no one notices because there in a poor area with no law or authority. I was reading a statistic that 2 million women and children are unaccounted for in the world. How does that even happen? People taking advantage of others. Exploitation of humans. There seems to be so many problems in the world it can be overwhelming . I guess it starts with education. Telling people have an awareness in the community. Hopefully media helps spread awareness. Then I think it is finding organizations and being in collaboration. But then where do yo go from there? 

Plenty to think about. How can you help your fellow humans in everything you do. I guess it starts with doing the small things in life. Kind, courtesy  and just being present. Just showing up in everything you do.